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TAME THE TEMPER
Sarcasm? Criticism? Rejection?

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October has been named "National Sarcastics Awareness Month" in an attempt to help everyone understand both the positive and the negative effects of sarcasm. Actions happen according to the way one is programmed by God and if this becomes an acceptance, then there is no guilt, pride, hate, envy or even the trace of self-esteem outburst. When everything falls apart, chase away the blues laughing as life is living now, in the moment, spontaneously, in full acceptance. Its worth a step out of the shadows to confront friendly and supportive approach. As mentioned in ‘Asserting yourself’ by Bower – think what’s wrong, make your request and predict an outcome. There, you get your submissive character to open up, less threatening and dominating, yet making point clear. The temper here needs to be tamed with arousal fear of possessiveness, sarcastic thoughts, and criticism with rejected feelings in times of dismissive ‘brushed off’ requests. Be it a kid, teenager or an adult – Sooner or later, any time in life you do face such a situation.

When worries go haywire, its time to get the ‘Red Alert Signals’ to stop the sarcasm, criticism, disdain, gloomy, despised and all those sorts of malign feelings popping on surface with a big Negative impact – This is the time to keep cool in the hottest of situations. The temper traits swings to shoot up and down with the unwanted emotional reactions, fear, anger, insecurity, anxiety, limited choices or inability to see possibilities, mental imbalances, negative attitudes, missing enthusiasm and so on. It’s the time to put perspective that ‘this too shall pass’ can be liberating to ease mind. When a person loses perspective, she is forgetting she is powerless over some things. If you are stuck in traffic and worried that you would be late, you curse the cars around you and try to snake in and out of congested lanes, you lose the perspective because you have no control over such a situation. Anger takes charge in control and these angry outbursts become a way of expressing feelings. Calm and cool disposition defuse the bubbling emotions within. It’s the inborn traits of being highly sensitive, self absorbed, defiant, aggressive personality who is prone to outbursts with ‘anger triggers’ outwardly or inwardly feeling alone, lost, rejected, avoided, unjustified. The sarcastic remarks makes it way, conflict makes way with differences and opinions vary when it’s the peak when you blow up and its time for taming the temper and gear back to control. On any walk of life, people often shout from frustration or fear as much as they do as a warning sign of violence. In the book ‘Taming the Dragon in your child’ the author says that teenagers anger outbursts due to a imposing a curfew – fuels the inferno. Eastman, the co-author focus on the new generation teens whose drive towards independence is slowed down with a parental protection and this is when sense of humor and understanding approach makes clear visions. Arguments leads to sarcastic remarks and criticism finds way in and when you are criticized, you ignore it or take the other person for a brisk walk instead. Self monitoring cools down the anger or sarcasm or the criticism approach within and dealing with such a situation needs a jump start of activities to stay calm and composed, the Kids Freesouls way, of course:

Socialize – Make connexions : Never be a loner brooding over the worries but move out in the open making connexions. Meet friends, visit fond places, mix with family and this will increase the feeling of strength and reduce the sense of helplessness. The ‘live in present’ attitude will make easy weapon to combat worry.

Get up – Jump start : Defuse the toxic worry the moment you feel it wrapping itself around you. Get up, jump start from where you are seated and just swing in action. Call a friend, walk around, watch a show, get hooked to some activity. Just remember, the longer you let worry last, the harder it becomes to escape.

Let music flow freely in your hearts: Music is the speech of angels. Its hard to worry and sing at the same time. Let your mind vibrate and your soul stir to the sound of the music. Music is a therapy which triggers peace within and reduces the tension and anxiety while often improving performances too. Its worth a pack up of troubles in old bag and smile, smile, smile.

Laugh: Humour is the best medicine ever prescribed to keep astray troubles. Tough times never last but tough people do. Humour restores the perspective and positive flow of thoughts emerge with rekindled rejuvenation.

Have the last hearty cry: Vent out your pent-up sadness. Let emotions trail down the tears once and for all. Automatically, the sarcasm, anger, hurt, rejected feelings go

Exercise: Physical exercise is a guaranteed stress reliever. Exercise reduces tension, drains excess aggression and frustration, enhances a sense of well being, improves sleep and aids concentration. It’s the anti worry agent.

God & You: Feel the soothing comfort while “let go and let god” feeling. Let go the impossible need of control. Pray as studies have found lower rates of depression among those who believe in god – Its meditation. Prayer and meditation help us keep things in perspective. They calm the minds.

Explore creativity: Be creative. Engage in a task you enjoy. Pursue hobbies; explore new avenues or just dive into endless work where mind is occupied. Believe in yourself and the things you can do. There’s never a day one feel the gloom if you are active, up and about.

Listen: Listening reason for a better understanding. Arguments spill anger eventually but talking way out with calm might hit a key note that can change the situations. Make the say slowly, clearly and carefully using simple practical foresight and listen with the same logical and practical understanding to derive a way out of frustration. Time takes it course in a natural way.

Safe Distances: The personal buffer zone is greater in times of stress. It is observed that people are too aggressive and their mental functionalities seem to shoot up when they encounter traits of temper doldrums. Safe distances and cool disposition on crowded roads while traveling avoids from road rashness driving. In times of troubled mind, the sixth sense works monotonous which may hit the wrong way down the lane and likewise, face to face with a verbal war too, safe distances cools down after some defused emotional outbursts.

To control anger is not an easy task but to melt down is certainly a positive signal to defuse a conflict and avoid the sarcastic remarks and think Positive. After all, it’s the self esteem that is an emotional vitamin and if there is good self-esteem, a person will not be threatened by differences.

The above Article is Copyright Freesouls
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